The Insane Lifestyle of Believing in Yourself: The Determination to See it Through

(Oct. 24, 2022 ● Oslin Pierrette)

“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

-Albert Einstein

With this version of the definition, I would say I accepted a life of insanity. I got to a point in my life where I want to do absolutely what I love. I honestly don’t value or care about things outside of that. I have passions and love, and I want to grow the world of those. Where I can access and live in a world of love and passion constantly. So my life mission is to obtain that, making the lifestyle of living a life of love, beauty, and passion. And everyday is me working towards building that for myself, it’s all I care about. All I can focus on. I know that sounds repetitive, and it may be. To constantly live everyday and the majority of my days  in hopes of obtaining the dream world I want to architect for myself. No matter if I live it 365 day in a row, and the dream world still isn’t visible yet. The majority of the next 365 days will be dedicated to obtaining my dream world, a life full of passion and creation, in the way I want it. I bought into the insanity of that, and it doesn’t even come off insane. It comes off as the way of life I’m supposed to live. 

I now have an absolute understanding that this is the life I’m going to live. Which gives me this absolute determination to constantly see it through. So I get to work on my passions. I’m constantly developing my skills in the fields of my passions, constantly creating. To the point where I’m falling in love with my creations and visions. I know I have the ability to create at a professional level and quality. That ability comes from my tastefulness and awareness. 

Those are top tier levels of importance when it comes to creating, especially taste. I don’t know where that ability comes from to be able to have and also grow your heightened perceptions and quality of how you perceive it(taste). But it’s a superpower, to have great taste and grow that. It gives you the ability to create beautifully satisfying visions and concepts, high taste level means you have a great feel of doing that. You just have to develop the discipline and skill to architect those ideas. That is the match made in heaven. Tasteful aspirations & skill to architect your aspirations, that’s how you become a creator of beautiful art & life. That’s what can buy you freedom to be autonomous. 

Once you understand that you have that ability. You understand that you’re the value, constantly creating it. This gives you the confidence that you can believe in yourself. That you could build something valuable. It’s hard to buy into conventional life once you understand that concept. So every second that goes into the conventional is a strain or a struggle. I don’t want to invest an ounce of my time on undesirable things. That undesirable life is more of a fuel and motivation to believe in myself more. I don’t want that life. Where there’s high chances that I have to resign from being myself, dissociate from myself most of the day, and most of the week doing that.

I absolutely want to live a life that I want. And that’s why it helps to be insane. I will only accept the life I want to live. That is the only answer. So you put everything into creating that. I don’t believe so, but even if it’s completely delusional, or unforeseeable, which I don’t believe is true. But even if it was, it doesn’t matter, I’m going to architect a way to make it work. I believe in my tasteful aspirations that I have, and have an understanding that I can architect that. I also believe in the catalog and product I already do have, I have way too much to give up. I believe my insane amount of insanity of keeping at it and creating this life I want to have for myself, is going to pay off one day. I feel that breakthrough, because I’m not aiming for an end goal, it’s more of a breakthrough. But I believe the breakthrough is gonna feel like the ending of The Pursuit of Happiness (2006). 

The Paradox of White Collar vs. No Collar Jobs: Why it’s One of the World’s Biggest Contradictions

(Oct. 24, 2022 ● Oslin Pierrette)

There is this huge paradox of White Collar vs. No Collar jobs. “Basically a lot of status comes with the white collar jobs. Like being an administrative director. You can go home to your family and praise that trophy sounding job. You get to be in an office, getting paid a good salary, with health & benefits. Wear a suit to work. Make it seem like you’re doing something with your life. But you goto work and really an administrative director is just cool sounding for someone who organizes files, makes sure the right emails are getting sent, setting up meetings. Something that a simple software or operating system can all do.  If this position got erased from the company, nothing will change, or the company might actually get more efficient. Not to sound too bleak, but a lot of these people aren’t adding any value to anything. They’re basically meaningless placeholders.” And these jobs are viewed as the pinnacle of jobs.

Then with No Collar Jobs. No collar has to do with art skills. These are jobs that once you start, a lot of people will demean you because they don’t see the value and purpose in doing those for work, that’s a widely common sentiment in society. It’s one of the most looked down upon. “Why do you want to become an artist? It’s a waste of time.” Why I believe White Collar vs. No Collar is one of the biggest paradoxes, because White collar makes money, yes, but a lot of the time serves little to no purpose. And typically those kinds of people don’t see value in no collar jobs, because they can’t see the monetary value. But no collar work creates the most value in the world. Art is the closest thing to life. Sometimes art is very lively, it’s the most valuable asset in this world, many forms of art. Most of the time, artists aren’t making money, but they’re constantly creating value. Their work is purposeful, and there’s just hope that their value will pay off and create monetary value someday. 

Like I remember I had a friend who worked in one of these white collar companies. Like this was my closest friend. I would be on the phone with her while she worked. And never had a slight understanding of her job, like at all. All I knew was she was some sort of Director of something, she went to meetings and dealt with emails. I’ve even listened-in on one of her meetings, and I just couldn’t get a concrete understanding of the purpose. Then there would be times where she would have a moment of reality and would admit, “I don’t know what I’m doing,” she didn’t feel any value from whatever she was doing. And around the same time, she came at me for believing and betting on myself, that I haven’t created any monetary value yet, touting her “high ground” saying she does real work. Which was a huge hypocritical contradiction, but sentiments that I’ve seen from white collar workers is that you have to lie to yourself. It’s better to be blissfully ignorant about your meaningless work, that is creating no value. Then to consciously understand you’re investing a lot of your time to work that has no value, that doesn’t create value, you’re just doing it for the majority of your time. 

I just want to know why this is such an enforced contradiction. But honestly I understand the tropes. Ones that even I used to believe in. And I get that there has been a heavy indoctrination with labor in human society. And if you don’t have a paycheck job, you’re looked down upon. Also, trying to succeed as an artist, usually is on the path of a struggling artist. That trope of being a struggling artist, that in many communities you will be completely looked down upon for trying to succeed in art and creating. It’s important to understand all these tropes and beliefs of people, to understand the indoctrination they went to that has them stuck in their own lives. Because say you give them what they want, give up and focus on a more “conventional” life. Get yourself a paycheck paying job and career, invest your time in doing that. I understand that’s a life in denying your life and inviting despair. Communities obsessed with the idea of taking pride in sacrifice as a sign of strength or something, in hard laboring lifestyles. Once you get a full understanding of why these people have these sentiments, and it’s foundation on meaningless under the guise of proudness or something like that. I understand that I don’t care for these people to be “proud” of me. I understand the meaninglessness and that it’s meaningless to me. We live in a world where there is no major community promoting love and happiness. But major communities encourage despairing lifestyles. People just accept it, especially when we get more information everyday that it shouldn’t be the way of life. And I just want to stay as far away from that as I can. 

Like I’ve seen a lot of these communities, even in my own experience. They just desperately want you to get one of those white collar jobs to “be something.” Then be proud of that person. Never care to ask, how they are doing, and if they are happy. Just proud that they are checking off all the boxes to make your community look good. Like getting a good paying job, a house & car. Also getting into a relationship and having a family, even if it’s a healthy one or not. As long as you check off the box, you’re fine. A healthy happy family is not a requirement. But also have seen people saying they love what they do, in the art field. And their community resents them for it. So seeing that absolutely disgusts me. I see no validation in there to sway me into something I don’t want. I don’t see value in that life. I don’t take life advice from people that reek of despair, trying to push those values on me.

That’s when you get an understanding that your lifestyle isn’t insane or crazy. It’s insane that this is the world that surrounds us, that major communities encourage despairing values. In understanding that, I detest that way of life. I have an absolute understanding of that. I’m not brave nor insane really, just very aware that a life of love is the only feasible lifestyle. It makes it easier for me to believe in myself. 

-OssyP

(I’m not saying don’t get a job, do what you need to do. But don’t buy into those lifestyles of undesirable work, if you don’t need to. Just use work as a tool to fund your dreams. Not settle for a career in undesirable living if you don’t need to. Also if your dream is within a certain career, do all you can to get there. Just never settle in an undesirable situation is the main point.)