(Jun. 22, 2024 ● Oslin Pierrette)
Who are you, I thought you were my wife. Even though you are an indistinguishable image of her, you have become completely unrecognizable. You are something absolutely different. But I’m still attached to you. Even in the absence of the woman I knew, the image of who I thought you were is what I’m still attached to. But truly what happened, what change, what have I done? How did the love shift all of a sudden? I’m convinced this isn’t how love operates, where you can all of a sudden just tune out. You have left me in deep tormenting confusion. I can’t make sense of anything. Please sit here with me and explain. Give me any ounce of solace of understanding, why all this. Just a piece of information where I can at least walk away with some dignity or a just a slither of a chance to build some dignity back. But I am left here in this tormenting confusion, with obliterated trust, that’s sending me into insanity.
Why this sudden vitriol to hurt me, to cross me, why do you want me to feel such betrayal? Why do you want me to feel this deep confusion, why do you want me to feel this pain? I am collapsing and deteriorating, is this what you want of me?
Yes I was your wife, and there was a point in time where I loved you. But do you think I have the mechanism of choice? There are realities that exist where people don’t own the mechanisms of will & choice. And I’m so far beyond that. I’m whatever the possessor discards me as. I am something no human would ever choose to be, but I am already in the reality of no choice, this is where my possession has brought me. I have been devolved into a nothingness, I am no longer me. In a world where most believe love conquers all, love is the greatest thing, maybe now I’m seeing parasitic possession is greater. What it offers me is the ultimate ecstasy, maximum pleasure, my possessor is my fix, my opioid, my greatest sensation. How could anyone escape their greatest sensation? Why would I impose my willpower to experience less in this world? If this is the greatest feeling I might as well follow it. And to fight that, feels like it goes against my nature. Do you judge me for it?
I understand you see me in bed with this non-human creature blob, but how can you judge me for it? Do you judge the actions of an addict who is so far gone in their dark times, in their unbreakable addiction. Don’t you understand they are losing to the beast that controls them. The actions they make under the possession of the beast, may not be truly an action or choice of their own, but what the sick possessed version of themselves compelled them to do. If you can see that, then you can see me, the absence of me under the possession of my beast. I understand many will look at me with utter disgust and disappointment, from a surfaceable point of view, I completely understand. But from a personal point of view, I too look at myself with utter disgust. When I see myself, my reflection, I see the abyss of absurdity that I have devolved into, I see the bed I’ve made, that I’m in it. I see the filth of my life. I see all that is wrong with me. And I will still remain here, my darkest reflection and understanding, that I will remain in my filth, because it’s the only place of meaning for me, my only stimulation resides in my filth. The most disheartening reflection and understanding, I’m in hell, and I’ll remain here, such an existentially dark outlook on life. And I can fight all I want, battle with it, but that’s just going to cause me insanity attacks, because even though I fight, I know what I’m coming back to, I understand I won’t win that fight. Do you understand where it feels like every fiber of your being, every tissue, every enzyme feels programmed and absolutely attached to your vices and addictions. All I own is a small futile thought of wanting something different, but with the grand understanding that I won’t get better. Hell is inescapable, come to terms with that, and accept the ease, or battle with that dark truth. That’s the only choice you probably can own. I would love to be me again, I regret crossing paths with this unbeatable parasitical possessor, but hell, this carcass abyss of absurdity is my life, where I reside now. I am gone.
In its abstract brush stroke, this film depicted this form of possession so beautifully. Because it speaks to a multitude of things in a beautifully potent way. I can’t escape hedonism, the devil’s religion. And what does this parasite or devil want, and you just seemingly get this idea that it’s heading for a collapse of humanity. Wants to enforce a deep sense of confusion, absurdity, where you’ll latch on to what this parasitic evil or devil can offer, VANITY and max pleasure & ecstasy! Extremely vapid elements that many of humanity get attached to. When it gets its claws deep enough in you, at some point you become ingrained in this hedonistic ultimate ecstasy where you can’t escape the fall into this abyss where you unravel and devolve into your abyss of nothing and ultimate demise of hell, absolute empty nothingness of your existence. In a world and life full of beauty, God’s blessing. You strayed away and chose vanity and hedonism, to where now you have lost your mechanism to choose and impose will for better. Now you are in a constant chase for your fix of pleasure and ecstasy, until you are all stimulated out. Or your devil and possessor has siphoned all they needed from you, and they can discard you as they please. Never put your faith in hedonism. Because there will come a time where there is no more access and you are left to deal with your hell, to points where it may be too far gone, and left in your agonizing demise.
Possession also spoke to the humanoids quest for the human takeover. There is a humanoid uprising that is absent of beauty and soul, but full of the quest for power and control. Why, I don’t always like to distract with why, because I don’t see that why changing by, I don’t see us fixing the reason or non-reason of the why. Evil and these dark entities seem to be an ever present part of humanity, and chance that in many cases it’s reasonless. So instead questioning a static truth, question how to mitigate their power These beings are parasitic, it’s growing & metastasizing. Abusing our attachment to pleasure to force us to see out their quest, do the devil’s bidding. To the point the devil can come out of the dark, and can come within the light, because it is far too late for humanity. We have collectively allowed evil, parasite, devil, whatever entity it is to rise to power, and now humanity will collapse. And I feel that chaotic end spoke to that truth. The replicated parasitic humanoid grew to full power. And the fall of humanity is upon us.
I don’t speak about films this way, but this was cinema. One of the greatest films. It is a perfect film. Just some of the greatest performances you will ever see. Speaking to so many deep profound elements & truth of humanity in such a potent way. It was just a beautifully crafted film. Just so ambitious. I love it. One of the greats.